What do Iyanla Vanzant and I have in common? Book titles that begin with the word, yesterday. Hers, Yesterday, I Cried ; mine, Yesterday When I Was Crazy: A Sacred Contract with Healing. There is common ground between us for sure. More importantly, there is some “good news” about healing in our hearts and on our minds. Thanks to Iyanla’s visionary work as a expert counselor, life coach and author of many books on the subject of healing, I was gifted with the idea of re-languaging. This golden strategy for self-healing released me from the bondage of negative programming and toxic self-talk. Oh was a relief it was to learn the sage advice that how I “language” my thoughts about my life and my health makes a monumental difference in my personal outcomes.
My words create my experience, was a tough life lesson to assimilate at first. I know what I mean, why does it matter what I say? Over and over again, I raised this question about the power and authority of my own voice. The more I changed my way of expressing my thoughts and beliefs about myself, the more I realized Iyanla was on to something BIG! So I practiced and practiced and practiced some more.
My favorite example of language worth changing is when Iyanla said, Don’t ever say, I”m broke. Say, I am temporarily out of cash. What a revelation! It was comforting to view financial insufficiency as temporary! Such a hopeful thought!
On August 10, 1999 (my birthday) on the Oprah Show, Iyanla shared how the power of language can help women change their lives. Thank God I was watching and listening with openness. Words create experiences. Words are things, Iyanla said. So when you say I can’t, you won’t. Oddly enough, my Mother never allowed me or my siblings to say, I can’t. At the time, I did not understand the import of her advice either. But to keep the peace, I complied. So glad about it now! Thanks Mom!
As I sought to follow the counsel of Iyanla urgings, I was constantly on the alert to “catch myself” in a lapse of consciousness about my spoken words. Fortunately, the attention I gave to this facet of my daily healing process began to self-integrate. The results were remarkable and reliable. I finally GOT IT! The words I speak about myself matter . . . a LOT! Now I know! Now YOU know!
Give this idea of re-languaging some thought. Then try it! You might like the difference you feel when you soften your self expressions about your life experiences. Be gentle with yourself with healing words and loving thoughts. In Chapter 11 of my book, What Do I Know For Sure, I share my views on a related subject, careless thinking costs/kills. Perhaps my stories will shine some light on self healing mechanisms that are at our finger tips and within our control. Healing is about sharing what works!
Discover more about therapies that work in my book, Yesterday When I Was Crazy: A Sacred Contract with Healing, available now on Amazon.com. Please share your comments below. Until next time . . .